Shards of Consciousness

Tanka # 8

you sit, judging tone
and tenor, rhythm and pace.
you frown, as a word
tumbles into it's neighbor.
i turn, a smile on my lips.

4 Responses to Tanka # 8

  • I've focused on this for a while now over the last day or so.

    I enjoy how is juxtaposes both the division of judgments between two judging parties, and between the virtue of harmony found in tone, tenor, rhythm and pace, and the virtue that can be found when that harmony is found absent.

    There sometimes is no wanting where wanting is found wanting.

  • Thank you, Dereck.

  • (I guess I wasn't done yet)

    ...And you know, I also like how this juxtaposition is completely possible outside of poetry and music. In other words, this poem stands as a representation of the way we judges can judge other judges in apparent opposition.

    Not bad for five lines.

  • This time we've found poetry, and not verse.

    I enjoy the tanka form. The walls it build instill a discipline that gives creativity focus.

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